THE MOST TEN REASONS TO STEAL YOUR MARRIAGE (PART 1)
The first thief: crazy preoccupation with life's business.
The relationship between the spouses is your first son, and this relationship needs a good kind of care, nutrition, and monitoring in order for it to become good and strong relationship.
You should learn to take care CLOSELY of your relationship, give it a good amount of time and understanding, find solutions to outstanding problems, and do not wait for unexpected explosions! The crazy preoccupation with the business of life does not leave you with enough opportunity to pay attention to nourish and strengthen your relationship with each other, and to grow in understanding and getting to know each other deeply. you should decide now that you would have enough time, whatever the burdens of life, to pay attention to your relationship together. It is life saving for your marriage.
The second thief: not agreeing on ways to spend money, and getting involved in financial debts.
Agreeing on ways to spend money is part of the unity of marriage, to think together and decide together, to rejoice together in abundance, and together endure times of want. This deepens oneness.
Exclusivity in decisions related to spending money, causes wounds to the other person, with all the consequences of the impact of these wounds. As for getting involved in debts, it places a great burden of psychological pressure, anxious reactions, and misunderstanding between the spouses and tension in their relationships together.
The Lord placed the man in the position of financial responsibility as the “head” of the family, but also placed the woman in order to be a “helper equal to him.” The Bible says, "Two are better than one," and this applies most to decision-making processes in financial issues. Take enough time, and training to know how to be in unity in making financial decisions!
The third thief: selfishness.
The real basis for a successful marriage is "LOVE", the desire to give, to sacrifice for the happiness of your spouse. As for selfishness and searching for what is mine, while ignoring the other and not considering his needs or interests, this destroys the core of marriage. Selfishness appears in a practical way in matters related to these things:
Eating and drinking: (one of you gets used to eating fancy food outside the house while there is no similar food available at home - or lack of interest in eating together as a family at home if circumstances allow it)
Comfort: (lack of appreciation for mutually offering comfort opportunities to each other)
Appointments: (if one of the parties considers his appointments more important than the other party)
Relationship with friends: (you value your friends more than you value your partner's friends)
Sexual relationship: (focusing on your needs and circumstances without considering the needs and circumstances of the other)
Buying clothes, dealing with kids, and many more.
The fourth thief: the unhealthy relationship with Mothers and Fathers In law.
Exaggerated emotional attachment with Mother and Father in law.
Neither party's appreciation for the family of the other party.
Parents' involvement in the family's decision-making process.
Parental intervention in the upbringing of children.
The need for a balance between loving and honoring the parents, while setting healthy boundaries for their intervention.
Fifth thief: Unrealistic Expectations
Both men and women have special longings, hopes, and expectations in terms of marriage and the relationship with their life partner. Longings and hopes are a beautiful thing for our lives, but these mistakes often happen:
1- Not expressing or adequately explaining these longings in a clear and understandable manner, or seeking to develop a plan to achieve them after explaining them. Many husbands and wives have this "imaginary" expectations that the other party must conclude and understand without anyone telling him/her!
2- Sometimes longings and hopes express “old daydreams” that we need to discuss again in a realistic way, and reformulate them, to make them compatible with practical reality.
3- We must link our longings and hopes with the appropriate times and circumstances, otherwise the different longings, due to the inappropriate timing or circumstances, become impossible longings.
4- When expectations are not met for the previous reasons, and without paying attention to these reasons, the inevitable alternative is "disappointments". When disappointments and frustrations continue, they become a real threat to the safety of the marriage.
(To be Cont..)
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